Return visits to a city are always conflicting. They're not nearly as overwhelming as the first...nor as intimate as the subsequent. It's a strange second date zone that I haven't figured out how to make sense of yet. It's been nearly two years to the day since I was last in Tokyo. That time has served to change the city, albeit slightly, and has done more to change me immensely. I have no clue what to expect this time around. I feel that revisiting any special place to you ups the ante. If it doesn't at least live up to the previous magic and exceed that..it's bound to feel like the initial wonder of is wearing away—or that you are. The bizarre things that seemed so novel and strange at the time lose their peculiarity once the cats out of the bag.
Yet, you can view it one of two ways...like a joke or a magic trick you've already seen before, or as a child hearing a fairytale again. Even after the story ends, you still want to hear it over again. Perhaps catch the details that you missed the first time around, or simply for the pleasure of reliving what you already know to be so amazing. For myself, one of the special things of returning is watching details of the city surface that I hadn't seen before. The oddities in the street signs and numberings I was too overwhelmed to see before, or the small nuances in gestures people make on the street...It's like seeing the progress a close friend of mine is making on a painting. I may never see it come to a completion or ever comprehend it fully, but each step of the way brings a greater clarity of understanding than before, regardless of how great or small it may be.
Along with this, seeing the familiar elements stay the same remind me why I fell in love with it in the first place. It won't ever feel like home. But there is a familiarity of rediscovering somewhere familiar that feels strangely like home to me. Hello again, Tokyo.